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5 Tips to stay out of your head

In the UK, the 10th-16th May is Mental Health Awareness Week, so these tips are my contribution to you for this week.

If you implement one thing from the list it will move towards improving your mental health.

As a co-dependent, I have spent far too much time living in my head. As co-dependents it helps us avoid us. That can be the pay back.

But living in our heads can be a dangerous place to be. I spent most of my life there with very little result save for feeling lousy and being stuck with creating the life I wanted.

Living outside my head is a better place and much more productive and fun. Let me explain what I mean when I talk about 5 tips to stay out of your head:

1. Overthinking. Do you ever find yourself over thinking something that it just takes up all your thoughts and you have room for little else? Stop this by deciding, and going with it. Remember “he who hesitates is lost”.

2. Living in the past. Boy, did I fall foul of this for most of my adult life. When I realised that the past was gone and I could never change it, I thought “sod it, it’s gone time to move on”. What I do with the past now is LEARN from it.

3. Feeling Sorry for yourself. This is not a helpful practice. Taking responsibility for your life and where you are can be extremely empowering and moves us away from being the victim. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, think about how you could improve your situation. What small steps could you take? Is there someone you could ask for support? Set goals. This is what I did many years ago when I was new to recovery, newly divorced with very little hope. I lived in the UK with no money and with no connections, back then. But I decided I was going to change, act and move forward, regardless. These thoughts and actions paid off. Today I have a lovely life, a beautiful home, and a devoted partner. Years ago, I had nothing.

4. Comparing yourself to others. This is the kiss of death!! Don’t do it. There will always be someone better off than you, better looking, more intelligent, whatever. Focus on what you have. Be thankful, and be the best YOU can be. Being the best you can be is a very attractive feature.

5. Fear or Worry about ‘what might happen’. Most of the time, these things never happen, so why waste energy worrying about them?


Pick one thing from the list and put into practice. Let me know you are getting on, that would be great too!

Warmest wishes, Maria.

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